Dear The Bridal Guru,
My fiancée and I are in a quandary. What should the men in the wedding party wear? We are seeing everything from jeans and a tux jacket to matching khaki suits to tails for weddings we have attended. What is the correct apparel for the guys to wear for a wedding?
Perplexed Groom
Dear Perplexed Groom,
This is a seemingly easy question, but in my 20 years in the wedding business it is actually very difficult to answer. “What should I wear for my wedding?” This question should be easy enough to answer, since every bridal magazine ever published has the same “How to Dress Your Men for Your Wedding” chart.
In the old days, outfitting weddings was easy. The choice was a black or a grey tuxedo, a black tailcoat and a grey cutaway. There were very limited choices for the guys. But as the brides want a more personal and custom look, so do you Grooms.
Begin by asking “what time is the wedding and how formal is it going to be?” You can go according to etiquette and any tuxedo shop can recommend what is appropriate.
The real problem with suggesting traditional attire for a formal wedding is that according to etiquette you should wear a cutaway with hickory striped pants for an afternoon wedding and a tailcoat with a pique vest and bow tie for an evening wedding. These styles are just not very popular right now.
I believe a person’s personal taste should be considered. This is extremely important since now, more than ever, young people are trying to define themselves with their dress. They are not necessarily interested in dressing like everyone else, especially for their wedding.
Is it possible to throw out tradition and still be formal? I say yes. By contemporary standards, a black tuxedo is always “formal”. With a wide assortment of jacket lengths and button configurations, the black tuxedo is not so basic anymore. “Our customer has over 20 different styles and lengths to choose from”, says Tom Steadman, owner of Tuxedo Junction in Jackson and Ridgeland. Guys get excited about it. Picking out their formalwear is fun and they enjoy it”, he continues.
The resurgence of vests has also brought excitement into men’s formalwear. “Most of our customers are more interested in sharp accessories than with a tuxedo style”, says Tuxes Too owner Doug Douglas. He also noted that, “choosing the right shirt and tie style is the biggest concern of today’s groom”.
The first question to ask yourself is, “do you want your pictures to date your wedding”? We have all seen wedding photos of men wearing the colored tuxedo with ruffled shirts, and immediately recognized it as 70’s. If you are not horrified by the image, then look at what colors are currently available in vests and ties. However, if the thought of your future children laughing at your wedding photos bothers you, then I would recommend a more traditional tuxedo.
It is extremely important for you and your bride to weigh the importance of etiquette, fashion, uniqueness and timelessness before choosing formalwear. By expressing the importance of each of these areas to your Formalwear Specialist, together you should be able to determine the right tuxedos for your wedding.
What’s your question for The Bridal Guru? Email at ask@msbridalguru.com
For a formalwear specialist near you, go to http://www.premierbridems.com/wedding-tuxedos and pick up your free copy of Premier Bride of Mississippi for more tips for the groom.